Today I found myself being unable to sit still and concentrate at work. I still find myself to be a dreamer at times, and there are days I long to just ditch the desk job and do something where I get to interact with people and really make a contribution to their lives. Heh, this is a strange statement coming from me, because as little as a year ago, I’d happily sit in my little corner and just do the things that are required and expected of me, and no more.

I find that I’m more of a social creature than I give myself credit for. Seems like I want to make up for lost time in doing different things. I just feel like I wake up each day and mindlessly wander through my job at times. It has its challenges, but I’d like to be a bit more creative, to explore other avenues, than just churning out numbers and fixing numbers in reports for people.

I am still very keen on taking photography to another level. The skill set is still being improved sporadically, but what I’d really like is to expose myself to the commercial world of getting clients, taking the pictures, and everything else that’s associated with it? I look back to when I was a student and wonder why we had our minds so set on being engineers, doctors or accountants, when there’s so much more to offer through cooking, designing, writing and other art forms. We were exposed to so little back then. Heh, I just don’t want to hold onto the past.

I guess having the Internet has exposed me to different ways of perceiving life. My view of it has changed quite a bit, having gone through university, working in NYC and being independent, to coming home and having a whole new set of challenges in my current job. As a student, I wanted to be able to work and earn cash to spend on things that I wanted. Heh, the first few years I bought my cameras and computers, and now I’m contented that I have a sizable collection of stuff sitting in my room. It allowed me the opportunity to try different things and form an opinion on all of them. The flip side I realise is that I don’t need so many items, but if I consolidated them, I’d be happy to keep a couple of computers and be more productive with getting things done (at current count, I own 5 computers, although one is permanently used by Vyanne) as I just don’t have as much time as I used to for tinkering with different stuff.

I’m just having so many ideas and thoughts in my mind now and it’s hard to make them coherent when you are thinking at 100 miles per hour. Now, I’m just committing myself to doing things that have been sitting on my to do list for the past year and clearing them out before the end of next month. Just feeling inspired now, and need to keep the motivation up before I lose track of myself again.